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3/12/2013

Milk's Favorite Cookie

Guess who turned 101 years old last week?

Me?  No! 

Oreo!

Yet another reason to love the Jerz, the Oreo was first sold in Hoboken a century ago.  Today, it is the world's best-selling cookie.  It has 32 million Facebook fans. 

And if you stacked the 450 billion Oreos made since 1912, they would stretch to the moon and back.

Five times.

They say women are more likely to pull an Oreo apart before eating it.  Hmmm... if only there was a robot that separated the cookie and the cream for you.  Oh wait, there is.  Named HERB.

They've come a long way since your lunchbox days. 

When you weren't looking, Oreos multiplied.  Been in the cookie aisle lately?  There are tons of variations on the classic chocolate sandwich cookie with the sweet cream filling. 

But are they better?  I had to put them to the test.

So, I bought 25 different kinds of Oreos (in the name of Important Research) and took over my parents' kitchen in Del Boca Vista. 

Here's how the cookies crumbled...


THE CHOCOLATE COOKIE COMPETITION

THE BEST:
Classic: "Pass the milk!" (mom & dad's fave)
Peanut Butter: "Oreo heaven." (my fave)

THE WORST:
Mint: "I like mint, but not this way." (mom & dad's least fave)
DQ Blizzard: "Tastes like... nothing." (my least fave)

THE OTHERS:
Double Stuf: "So sweet it hurt my teeth."
Chocolate Creme: "Chocolatey or chalky, I can't decide."
Berry: "Interesting."
Triple Double: "Too much cookie, too little creme."





THE GOLDEN COOKIE COMPETITION

THE BEST:
Neopolitan: "Berry good." (mom & dad's fave)
Golden Double: "Tastes like a Vienna Finger." (my fave)

THE WORST:
Heads or Tails: "Chocolate lost this flip." (everybody's least fave)

THE OTHERS:
Golden Chocolate: "Is this one a mistake?"









THE FUDGE CREMES COMPETITION

THE BEST:
Coconut: "I could eat the whole box." (mom & dad's fave)
Peanut Butter: "Tastes like a Tagalong." (my fave)

THE WORST:
Golden: "Was this a yellow one?" (mom's least fave)
Mint: "Not bad if you like mint, which I do not." (dad's least fave)
Coconut: "Yuck." (my least fave)

THE OTHERS:
Regular: "How can you not love an Oreo covered in chocolate?"
Chocolate Creme: "Yep, that's a chocolate!"






THE SPECIALTY CREME COMPETITION

THE BEST:
Gingerbread: "It's festive!" (mom & dad's fave)
Birthday Cake: "I think I like the vanilla-ish-ness." (my fave)

THE WORST:
Halloween: "Is this supposed to have a taste?" (nobody's fave)












THE CAKEY COMPETITION

THE BEST:
Brownie: "I guess I can like this." (mom & dad's fave)
Golden Cakester: "Tastes like a Twinkie... RIP." (my fave)

THE WORST:
Cookie Sticks: "This is a stupid idea." (nobody's fave)

THE OTHERS:
Double Stuf Cakester: "Will be a Devil Dog when it grows up."








BEST IN SHOW

Mom: Coconut Fudge Creme (Classic a close 2nd)

Dad: Classic Oreo

Me: Peanut Butter Oreo (Classic a close 2nd)










So, can you have too much of a good thing?  No.  Even the bad ones were still pretty tasty (except for that weird cookie stick and oily creme dip -- that was gross). 

But it's safe to say the classic Oreo is still the best.  Just don't forget the milk. 

And don't smile -- nobody likes "Oreo Teeth."




tags: food, jersey, polls, taste tests

3 comments:

chris said...

Is this dedicated to me? :)

Here's a song for you........
Whos that kid with the OREO cookie?
They forever go together what a classic combination
When a dark delicious cookie meets an icy cold sensation
Like the one and only creamy crunchy chocolate
O-R-E-O

Anonymous said...

yummie

Anonymous said...

OREO TEETH LOL