A Resolution I Probably Won’t Break

At the dawn of each new year, I make resolutions I don’t keep.

It's no surprise, really. I know I won’t keep these promises, even as I’m making them. But I make them anyway. Every. Single. Year. I’m sure my weak will says something loathsome about my character, but I don’t have the energy or desire to explore it. And I’m sure I’m not alone -- you can’t possibly keep yours either, right?

Why start a fresh year as a failure? That can’t be good for our karma.

So last night, as I was watching Dick Clark struggle through another New Year’s Rockin’ Eve, I decided to make a resolution I think I can actually live with.

In 2009 I will NOT be making a list of chores that focus on things I need to fix (like my split ends, my invisible boyfriend, and all the Christmas cookies that have made a cozy new home on my thighs). No, this year, I’m starting the Anti-Diet in restaurants that wouldn’t know a healthy entrée if it landed smack in the middle of their plate (making the likelihood that I’ll actually stick to this resolution exponentially higher).

My thinking is simple: Since I break down and eat junk food every single year, why not just cut to the chase and resolve to do it? This stroke of genius (Jenius?) is a classic win-win. If I accomplish it, I’ve FINALLY kept a resolution -- and a tasty one at that. And if I don’t, maybe I’ll shed some lbs from all the junk I WON’T be consuming.

Winner winner chicken dinner.

Without further delay, I give you my (not so) haute cuisine hit parade, along with one naughty and one nice thing I might order while I’m there:

Chat & Chew – 10 East 16th Street
Nice: Thanksgiving on a Roll
Naughty: The quintessential mac & cheese

Chip Shop – 383 Fifth Avenue, Brooklyn
Nice: Fish & chips
Naughty: Fried Twinkie

Cowgirl Hall of Fame – 519 Hudson Street
Nice: Frito Pie
Naughty: Texas onion loaf

Creperie NYC – 135 Ludlow Street
Nice: Nutella crepe with whipped cream
Naughty: S’mores crepe with ice cream

Doughnut Plant – 379 Grand Street
Nice: Vanilla bean doughnut
Naughty: Jelly-filled square doughnut

The Hog Pit – 37B West 26th Street
Nice: Sweet potato fries
Naughty: Candied bacon with whipped cream

Peanut Butter & Co – 240 Sullivan Street
Nice: The Peanutbutter Club
Naughty: The Elvis

Pommes Frites – 123 2nd Avenue
Nice: Regular Belgian fries with honey mustard
Naughty: Double order with cheese

Serendipity 3 – 225 East 60th Street
Nice: Lemon ice box pie
Naughty: Peanut butter frrrozen hot chocolate

Shake Shack – Madison & 23rd Street
Nice: The Arnold Palmer
Naughty: Concrete vanilla shake with caramel and toffee

I plan to visit one per month, so the last two eateries I'll visit will be wild cards, for when I’m feeling totally spontaneous (unlikely, I am a planner to the core), or when inspired by someplace I just read about or saw on TV. To keep myself honest, I’ll be updating the comments section of this post each time I check one off.

And nobody likes to eat alone -- so if any of these places look good to you too, consider this your open invitation to grab a fork and join me!

Happy New Year!