America250

Who knew it would take a million FIFA fans to remind us all how Captial A - Awesome - America is?

From the delights of discovering creamy ranch dressing, to the sweet, sweet relief of air conditioning, to the purple mountain majesty of a Walmart Superstore, where you can pick up pork chops, underpants and a big screen TV all under one roof -- they are in AWE and having the time of their lives.

And so should we!  

If our country's 250th birthday isn't cause for a star-spangled celebration of unabashed patriotism, what is?  Bigger than any party or president, America is a pu pu platter of possibility.

Sky's the limit!

This is the greatest experiment the world has ever known. We are accomplished. Ambitious. Audacious. Admired. Accepting. Abundant. Altruistic. Awe-inspiring.

And humble. 

Sometimes.

Like me!

Are we perfect? No, nothing is. But as Bill Clinton once famously said, "There is nothing wrong with America that cannot be cured by what is right with America."

Being born in the USA is like winning some kind of lottery. Visionaries founded this country 250 years ago and we carry that same pioneer spirit in each of us. We didn't invent the wheel (thanks, Mesopotamia!) but we invented just about everything else. Electricity, movies. railroads, automobiles, flight, space travel, TVs, rock & roll, the internet, smart phones, Spring Break, baseball, sliced bread, free refills and yes, air conditioning.

Plus about a billion other cool things.

From sea to shining sea, America is teeming with opportunity. Nobody lays their head on a pillow at night imagining the British Dream.  Or the Mexican Dream.  Or the Chinese Dream.  

NO.

It is the AMERICAN Dream.  And there's nothing like it in the world. Allow me to quote from the Declaration of Independence, the part we all know: 

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

Who says that? Who is that bold?  Who dreams THAT big?

Washington, Jefferson, Franklin, Madison, Adams and Hamilton, that's who!

They're more than just words on a page. It is the soaring spirit of 1776. The beating heart of freedom.  

Reagan said we were founded by people who had a special love for freedom and a special kind of courage.  It's true.  We are not just a democracy. We are a meritocracy. With hard work, anything is possible.  Sure, sometimes you get your butt kicked but you get back up.

Rocky Balboa taught us that.

Even on the worst day, there's nothing better than livin' in America. Freedom is THAT good. So raise the stars and stripes, gather all of your favorite people and celebrate this beautiful country we call home.

HBD America, let's party like it's 1776. Cue the fireworks!

A Prayer

What a profoundly sad week.  

It started with a viral video of a random, brutal killing of a young woman on a train. Then came a horrifying political assassination of a young man on a college campus. And yesterday, there was a high school shooting on the 24th anniversary of 9/11, always a gut-wrenching day.

My heart is so heavy.

In moments like these I turn to writing.  So, here goes...

We are living in a time of massive political unrest, much like the 1960s, I suspect.  A powderkeg ready to explode with wars, protests, riots, violence, and assassinations, where the sanctity of human life comes a distant second to the blind pursuit of ideology, regardless of whether or not it is rooted in reality.

People casually toss heated words around like grenades: Oligarch. Autocrat. Fascist. Socialist. Marxist. Communist. Does everybody who uses these radical labels even know what they mean? Can they explain the differences?  

I know I can't. 

But we all know they are bad. Labels you don't want. Designed to hurt and dehumanize people with whom you disagree in order to justify awful actions. 

Words like these -- and worse -- when repeated ad nauseum and amplified by politicians, celebrities, the media, teachers, and your next door neighbor can hypnotize you into believing they are true and motivate the mentally unstable to act in unthinkable ways.

Ultimately, I think fear got us here. 

Fear of inconvenient truths. Fear of speaking up. Fear of opposing ideas. Fear of losing a deathgrip on absolute power. This fear has led to rage.  And hollow condemnations of the exact violence that gaslighting fearmongers have inspired makes it all worse. 

Inbetween my sadness, anger and shock of this week, I have to wonder... when did we stop agreeing to disagree? And when did the ideas we disagree with stop being simply WRONG and start being EVIL?

I mean, you'd do anything to stop someone truly evil, right?  Even something as extreme as taking a life feels justified when the stakes are that high.

But what if YOU'RE wrong?

There are no do-overs in life and death.

Whether it is the last gasps of a woman on a train, or a man on a stage or thousands in burning skyscrapers, death seems like the ultimate silencer -- quieting the deafening voices floating inside someone's mind or firing out of someone's mouth. 

But voices are stronger than bullets. And knives. And planes.

There are countless examples throughout history, from Joan of Arc to John Lennon. When someone attempts to unjustly silence a voice, it becomes an echo.  

On the surface, it may look like our country is divided left vs right, but I think the existential battle we are facing today isn't political, it's spiritual.

Good vs evil, hope vs hate. Could a belief in something bigger and better than ourselves fix this frightening state we're in? Maybe. Faith steps in to right our path when we've lost our way or swallows us up into the darkest hole when we turn our backs. 

Faith. We need more of it.

My faith is usually private. Quiet. And strong. Even as a Catholic, my faith doesn't expect me to sit in a church pew every Sunday to be considered a good person -- doing good things does!  Especially when they are hard or unpopular. 

On their worst days, people of faith don't look down, they look up. Anybody who thinks otherwise doesn't really get why people pray. It isn't the same as a wish you make on a birthday cake or a dandelion. It comes from your soul to ask for strength and courage in the dark.

Today is dark.  So this is me, asking.

We are at a tipping point. This experiment called America feels fragile and wounded, but I still wouldn't want to live anyplace else. Sitting here in the long shadow of 9/11, I never thought I would want to go back to that time. But amidst all that numbness and horror, a beautiful light emerged as our country united, as AMERICANS. 

Stitched together by what we had in common, not ripped to shreds by what divides us. 

Tonight, I pray to God that the brave souls who lost their lives 24 years ago and the precious lives lost this week will join a chorus of angels who will heal our nation.

We need it now more than ever.

Amen.

#TeamUSA

I sometimes forget that I'm French.

From food to fashion to films, I identify most with my Italian side. 

But from my last name, to the 7 years I studied en Français, to that one time I visited Paris, to my beloved Louis V Neverfull large tote, to the fact that I can literally eat my weight in fluffy croissants, I remember... 

I am half French too!

And oh la la, France sure put on a show last night. 

You know, I don't usually get swept up in Olympics Fever.  The last time I remember really following the games was when Michael Phelps was sweeping up gold medals in Beijing in 2008. 

But this year just hits different.

The stunning venue absolutely plays a part. I don't think there ever was a more beautiful sight (or site). For the first time, the opening ceremony didn't take place in a stadium but in a whole city. 

Magnifique! 

And I am looking forward to seeing how Simone Biles, Katie Ledecky and Sha'Carri Richardson fare.  But maybe more than all that, I think as a country we really need something to unite us. 

Right now.

A reason to cheer!

We live in a time where we are reminded daily of the things that divide us -- especially in an election year. But the Olympics gives us a chance to celebrate being the UNITED States of America.

Remember that? It's in the name!

So, I'm all in with the Red, White & Blue. I've even got my official Ralph Lauren-designed tee, sweatshirt & tote so I can have all of the style and none of the skill of #TeamUSA. 

At least I'll look good...

This spectacular show kicked off with the flurry of a thousand can-can girls, even if she was a little soggy from the rain. Since the Olympics symbol has 5 rings, here are my 5 mesmerizing moments from the truly dazzling opening ceremonies:

That Beautiful Boat Parade
How cool was it to see 200 countries float down the River Seine smiling ear to ear with colorful flags waving? I even learned about few new ones! Each team was full of hope and hard work on their way to the torch lighting ceremony. And the rain was no match for our flag bearers Lebron James and Coco Gauff who led nearly 600 emotional athletes in a “USA! USA!” chant as they cruised to the Eiffel Tower. Bonne chance, mes amis!

Heavy Metal Marie Antoinette
Who needs medals when you have metal? The French Revolution was in full swing with Do You Hear the People Sing from Les Mis. As bright red ribbons spilled over the sides of the Conceirgerie down to the cobblestone streets, dozens of Marie Antoinettes held their own decapitated heads as headbangers rocked the river. A spectacle to behold.

Hold Me Closer Flying Dancers
Gravity-defying acrobats were swinging and swaying on stilts twenty feet in the air making for a wild ride over the Pont Neuf bridge, which was as wet as the water below. It was so graceful and yet so nerve-wracking. I still don't understand how they did it!

Her Heart Will Go On
There were many great muscial moments, but it was Celine Dion who brought down la maison with her stunning performance of L'Hymne À L'Amour (her first time singing in public since a sad medical diagnosis). Perched with her pianist on a balcony of the shimmering Eiffel Tower, high above the City of Lights, she was a showstopper. I saw her once at Caesar's Palace in Vegas with Cirque du Soleil and back then she put on a helluva show. It was so moving to see her in this gorgeous finale.

Up, Up and Away
What began with a masked man leaping across rooftops to a steel horse gliding down the river to a steady stream of A-list athletes, the torch was passed from person to person until it lit a flaming hot cauldrom, turned hot air balloon, in the Tuileries Garden. It was a glowing send-off to a fabulous four-hour fête.

After all THAT, I say, bonjour et bonne chance aux États-Unis! 

Let the games begin...

(And because I really couldn't choose just 5 moments, here's a whole bunch more pretty stuff.)

Enough

Mass shootings.  I haven't written about this topic for 10 years.  

I try to keep it pretty light around here, but sometimes I have to talk about the heavy stuff. Like in 2012, when I wrote about the massacre at Sandy Hook.  Since then, countless others have lost their lives and loves to senseless violence.

Today's mass shooting hit particularly close to home. 

It was in Highland Park, IL, a quiet suburb of Chicago where my brother, sister-in-law, niece and nephew live.  I thank God that they are here in Florida right now, away from the madness, but they easily could have been at the July 4th parade on Main Street in their hometown.

When did going to a PARADE become a life or death decision?

The news that's been coming out all day is devastating.  So many innocent people are hurting.  And I feel that.  But I'm mad, too. It's been 23 YEARS since Colombine in '99, and yet here we are -- another young man with a gun decides to unleash his rage on an unsuspecting community of sitting ducks. 

How?

WHY?

And what the eff is wrong with our leaders that they can't -- or won't -- address these unthinkable events that occur with horrifying regularity?

Look, I don't pretend to have all the answers, but I do know this: The solution is not one-note.  

Ban all assault weapons? Sure, semi-automatic rifles are definitely part of this problem, but as I said 10 years ago, a ban will really only affect the law-abiders among us.  Criminals will still do whatever they want. That's what they do -- they're criminals.

Mental health is another component of this, no doubt -- the destigmatization of mental illness, access to help, real resources for family and friends, and early detection of warning signs before tragedy strikes are all needed.

But if we're being honest, access to weapons and unchecked mental health issues have been around for DECADES, if not centuries, right? Why is this boiling over in the 21st?  What's so different about the time we live in now?  

I think the answer is the Internet.

It is the most powerful invention of my lifetime, putting the world quite literally in the palm of our hands. It has the capacity to do wonderous things, to connect people, to know everything -- the possibilities are limitless.  I mean, I've made a living doing all things digital for the past 20+ years, so I obviously love it. 

But as we all know, there is also a very dark side to the Internet. And I think THAT is the biggest factor as to why we've seen a sickening surge in mass shootings since it came to be.

To me, there are 3 reasons the Internet is the tipping point for all this death and destruction:

• Easy Access. Access to information on how to do horrible things. Access to others who share your warped views.  Access to places that sell questionable and dangerous items which can be used to do harm.  Access to videos and games that help you simulate the terrible act you're about to commit. Anything or anyone is just a click away. 

• Instant Notoriety. Mix a 24-hour news cycle that craves fresh content with the social media like-cycle (and the dopamine hit you get when something goes viral), and you've got a recipe for disaster -- especially for someone who feels wronged, dismissed, or overlooked by society. 

• Emotional Detachment. The Internet is a place to connect AND disconnect.  So keyboard warriors can say hurtful things they'd never say to someone's face, or gamers can slaughter hundreds for sport. We've created a generation that can do and say sick things online and never blink an eye. Is it that much of a leap that this mindset extends to real life?

Our leaders -- ALL of them over the past 20+ years -- have failed us at every opportunity to seriously address this epidemic. Since technology helped us get into this mess, let's use it to help us get out.

Here are 2 ideas:

• Monitor the Internet. There are LOADS of red flags uncovered in someone's digital footprint AFTER they've done something unthinkable. Social media manifestos. email threats and dangerous search histories abound in a predictable pattern of behavior that leads up to these heinous acts. What if we got ahead of that to prevent it from happening in the first place? If we can flag Covid misinformation, surely we can do this.

• Install Listening Devices. If Alexa can listen for your favorite song, and Siri can call your mom, imagine if these devices existed in schools, churches, temples and other vulnerable places? It wouldn't require a child crouching in a closet to call 911 on their cell phone, the room would already be listening for cries for help and gunshots to automatically alert the authorities and send help immediately. Are YOU listening Google, Facebook and Apple?

Is this controversial?  Yes. Is it a slippery slope?  Maybe.  But what we've been doing isn't working. 

I don't pretend to have all the answers, but I know we need to do something different.  Now.

Enough is enough.

Election Eve

So it's Election Eve and I legit don't know who I'm voting for tomorrow.

If you know me, you know who I WANT to vote for.  But they certainly don't make it easy -- especially because I'm not even sure I LIKE this person.

Is this real life?

I truly can't stomach conversations about the election for one more second.  I feel like my pancreas might explode.  I especially hate having these convos at work.

Every time the topic comes up I feel like saying, "Excuse me while I go eat this sandwich on the toilet."

HOW can we not come up with better candidates? And HOW is this race so close?

Polling is all within the margin of error.  And at least where I live and work, TONS more people feel comfortable saying that they are voting for Hilz than for The Donald (even if that's what they secretly plan to do).

So... who's really in the lead?

I'm scared by either outcome.  I think tomorrow's going to be a long day and an even longer night.  And we'd better hop in our Deloreans, folks, because I think we're headed back to 2000 with a contested election, hanging chads, and fights over popular vs electoral votes.

Why wouldn't we?

Our voting system is completely broken (I told you that back in 2012) and in 16 years nobody bothered to try and fix it.  You know DJT won't abide by a HRC victory.  He has one setting: Scorched Earth.  And if the tables are turned and HE wins, I can't imagine SHE will sit idly by and fade into the sunset.

Hell no!  It will be a dumpster fire.

So, the best we can hope is that the difference in votes is greater than any fraud that could be perpetrated on either side.  And that dumb Gary Johnson doesn't muck it all up.

Shit.

I hope the right answer comes to me in a vision so I can hold my nose -- and pull that lever.

And to anyone who thinks they know exactly what will happen tomorrow, I'll leave you with one word: Brexit.

Yikes.  Buckle up.


tags: politics, rants

Mind the Gap

So, a cool thing happened at work today.

See this pic?  It was taken by a colleague as another colleague of ours (who is a pretty inspiring gal herself) moderated a Town Hall discussion on equal pay with the President.

The President of the United States?

Yep.  We go way back...

Why were we there?  Because yesterday was Equal Pay Day.  Did anyone wish you a happy one?

Probably not.

That's because it takes a woman until April 14th of the following year (an 104 extra days "in the red!") to make what her male colleagues make in 365.  Keep in mind, this is for doing the same work.

Put a different way, on average, a woman earns 78 cents to a man's dollar -- for women of color, it only gets worse. So at the current rate, women won't reach parity until 2058.

Will you still be working then?  As much as I love my job, I certainly won't. You'll find me in a yellow mu-mu on a sandy beach under a very large straw hat drinking an ice-cold glass of Ensure.

Ahhhh.  Smooth.

But even if I do slog it out until I'm 100 and climb all the way up to the C-suite, today only 26 Fortune 500 companies have female CEOs.

That can't be right... right?!

To be clear, I don't believe in my heart of hearts that the companies of the world are actively conspiring against us. I doubt a bunch of old, wrinkly, white dudes sit in a sauna every Tuesday at 2 to joke about how little they can pay their women (except maybe at Goodyear).

I'm really not that cynical.

I DO think that women often start out making (accepting?) less.  And then every single cost of living increase, raise or bonus they EVER receive represents a percentage of that number.

My number was $18K.

That's what I made nearly 20 years ago in my very first job in Parsippany, NJ, as an editorial assistant for a children's textbook company.  And everything I've gotten since then has had to pivot off what was essentially less than a year's tuition.  Back when college was still affordable.

And maybe I'm lucky!  Who knows?  But it was a loooong way to dig out.

So, this is the ONE piece of advice I give to every intern I meet: Get the most you can when you graduate, because that starting salary will factor into the rest of your career.

Now, people definitely dispute the 78 cents disparity.  They say it's because women make choices to focus on family or education to achieve that elusive (impossible?) work-life balance.  And that means they work less hours, so it's inherently not equal work and shouldn't be compensated as such.

Is that true?

Well, I can't speak for ALL women, but for THIS woman, who isn't making "choices" and IS betting everything on her career, I can think of no less than 3 companies I've worked for in the past where I was paid less and/or given less opportunity for advancement than my equally non-choosy (yet skilled, educated, and hard-working) male colleagues.

Equal pay SHOULD be for equal work! I'm not entitled to it, I EARN it every day. And I suspect you do, too.

But look at the positioning of the Town Hall today: Obama talks to Mommy Bloggers. Grrrr...

Sidenote: Not sure who decided that a female + a blog = the ultra-patronizing nickname "mommy blogger." Wait, did I have kids and I forgot?  No, seriously. I even looked under the couch cushions.  No kids here!

(And yes, that makes me sad, but that's a whoooole other discussion.)

My point is that woman doesn't always equal mom. (Does anyone call guys "daddy bloggers?" No, we don't, because it's dumb).  And yet, most of the discussion on equal pay centers around how does it impact women and their families?

It's an interesting nuance, I think.

I feel like, as women, we don’t often allow ourselves to ask for things solely because they benefit us – especially at work -- be it equal pay, a raise, a promotion, or a day off.  It needs to be qualified in some way.  Necessary to support your kids, or for some other greater good, rather than because WE went to school and we work hard and we earned it.

For ourselves.

Now, if you're still reading and are unconvinced this is a pretty serious issue, I've saved the best/worst for last.  Go ahead and plunk your age and salary into this lost earnings calculator (and fellas, don't feel left out here -- if your lady makes less, so do you).

Thanks, Gap Inc., for advancing the discussion on equal pay -- how fitting!  I will put my money where your pants are.

Then maybe someday, old bran flakes over here can afford to buy that house on the beach.


So, what say YOU?  Is the pay gap a genuine thing?  Or a gimmick?  Share your 2 cents below...


tags: politics, rants, work

Enough Is Enough

When a person runs someone over with a car, you don't blame the car, you blame the driver, right?  They were drunk/distracted/texting.  That's because a car isn't intended to be a weapon.  It gets you from Point A to Point B.  It has been misused if it kills someone.

A gun, though?  Yeah, that IS intended to be a weapon. 

Sure, it's used for target practice and skeet shooting.  But ultimately, it's meant to kill an animal/intruder/enemy/attacker.  Oh, and you can pick one up at Walmart or Kmart or any other Mart for as little as a 100 bucks -- along with pork chops and underpants.  Convenient. 

And insane!

You know what's hard to get?  Mental health counseling.  Restraining orders.  Help.

They also say now isn't the time to talk politics. Now is the time to grieve.

I beg to differ.

Of course all our hearts break over the senseless loss of ANY life, but now is EXACTLY the time to talk politics -- before this happens again.  I'm not naïve enough to think that repealing the 2nd Amendment will stop all gun violence.  It will stop law-abiding gun users, criminals will still do whatever they want because guess what?  They're criminals!  

But I do think the 2nd Amendment was written at a time when the "right to bear arms" meant defending yourself with a double-barrel shotgun from poachers stealing your land or grizzlies eating your kids and the nearest sheriff was hours away. 

This is not that time. 

Random gun violence is out of control, and our leaders have done nothing but wring their hands and stick their heads in the sand.  Think about it:  Colombine -- where 21 were wounded and 12 killed -- happened over 13 YEARS ago. What have we learned?  What have we fixed?

Nothing.

• 5 months ago, a man opened fire in a Colorado movie theater showing The Dark Knight -- 58 wounded, 12 killed
• 4 months ago, a man opened fire in a Wisconsin Sikh temple -- 4 wounded, 6 killed
• 3 DAYS AGO, a man opened fire in a crowded Oregon shopping mall -- 1 critically wounded, 2 killed
• And today, a man opened fire in a Connecticut elementary school -- 26 killed, 20 of them kids under the age of 10

Movie theaters?  Temples?  Malls?  Elementary schools?  The world's gone mad.

Massacres have become commonplace.  Enough is enough.

I honestly don't know how to solve this, but something has got to be done.  Quickly.  In 39 years, I have never signed a petition. 

I signed this one today.  Join me?

tags: politics

Please Fix Voting (It Is Broken)

See the girl in the middle of this photo? 

That's me, at age 17, in the lobby of Montville Township High School. (Go Mustangs!)

I'm all hopeful and smiley, sitting next to my BFF. Look at my hair! Total Jersey.

Now, look at the signs behind me.

Vote!

That was 1991. And I’ve voted in every presidential, senatorial, gubernatorial, and mayoral race since 1992.

Fast forward to today – Election Day 2012. My hair is flatter and my hope has been replaced by frustration.

But this post isn’t about WHO should be president for the next 4 years. It’s not even about urging citizens to exercise their right to vote (which they totally should). It’s about something bigger than electing the leader of the free world.

It’s about the process itself.

Our voting system is beyond broken. Somebody, please fix it.

This morning, I arrived at PS166 in midtown Manhattan at 8:45, and FINALLY cast my vote sometime around 11:15. For anybody who likes to count, that's two and a half hours later...

I know this year's election had extenuating circumstances from the hurricane.  But the length of time I waited didn't have to do with voter turnout.  It had inefficiency (and chaos) written all over it.  During this time I spent on disorganized lines, which snaked around city blocks, stairways, lunch tables, and a gymnasium, I saw the following:

• A guy that lives in my building who got tired of waiting on line was given a ballot in the middle of the gym. No ID check, no signing the book.  So much for registered voters.
• A guy was confused on how to fill the ballot out. He leaned over to the stranger next to him, who told him just to fill in the circle for Obama. He said ok. So much for no campaigning within 200ft of a polling place.
• A man and a woman sat together on a bench next to the check-in table for my district (#11). While I was showing my ID, he filled out his ballot. Then he filled HERS out while she stared off into space. When I told the volunteer (who sat 3ft from the couple) what I was witnessing, she shrugged. "Nothing I can do," she said. So much for election inspectors keeping things on the up-and-up.
• A volunteer who took my completed ballot reviewed all my choices, before the machine accepted my vote.  So much for privacy.

It should be easier to vote now than at any other time in history, but it’s not. We can do better than this!

Here's my 3-step fix:

1. Privatize:
It needs to be said.  Elections should be run by impartial voting agencies (preferably from the private sector), NOT elected officials. If the majority of the world runs this way, why can’t the USA?

2. Modernize:
I vote in NY, which recently upgraded from giant metal-lever voting machines circa 1950 to Scantron machines circa 1980. I took my SAT with those things! This is 2012, right? Why are we waiting on interminable lines? Why did someone steal the tethered pen in my voting “booth,” leaving me to root around in my purse to find nothing to write with but a tin of Altoids and a tampon? If I can deposit a check into my bank account using my cell phone, why can’t I vote online?  Get with the times!

3. Standardize:
Let's get the whole country on the same page. Primary elections? They should be held twice – once with all candidates, and once with the top 2 – simultaneously across the country, not winding down over months and months like a political game of chicken. Early voting? Every state should have it – or not – and for the same set amount of time. Machines? Everyone should use the same kind. Election Day? Should be a holiday so everyone can get there. And identification? Require it. You can’t get a beer without an ID!

Bonus: While I'm fixing stuff, let's get rid of the Electoral College and go to a popular vote so a handful of swing states aren't given the power to decide the fate of an election for the entire country. And every vote actually counts.

So, what do YOU think?  In pure democratic fashion, here's a poll.  On the internet.  What a concept...

poll by twiigs.com

tags: holidays, politics, polls

Dislike

You know, I love my social media.  I have Facebook open all day long.  For work.

Mostly.

And I pop on from time to time at home during nights and weekends too.

My favorite thing is seeing all the pics of people's kids (except when they’re on the potty – my eyes!), and their pets (eh…), and the cinnamon bun somebody just ate that looked EXACTLY like Justin Bieber (it was like his twin!!).

But there are a few types of people on Facebook that I kind of loathe.


Maybe you know these people too?

THE POLITICO
I would really like to still be friends with all my friends on Nov 7th. So PLEASE pipe down with the amateur political analysis, lame photo captions, misquoted soundbites, and insulting running commentary. They like their guy. I like my guy. Or maybe we even like the same guy. Just zip it! Binders and Big Bird and the 47%. Birth certificates and liberal media and apology tours. It’s all baloney. Jobs. Debt. Healthcare. Defense. We have some serious issues to vote on, and the guy who gets elected will be everybody’s President, not just the folks who voted for him. So take the passion to the polls and keep it out of my newsfeed. (And get off my lawn!)

THE RELENTLESS PROMOTER
I know a few people who have started small businesses. One friend from an old job launched a t-shirt company in India. Another friend from high school started a cookie company in Jersey. An old boss/dear friend created a magnificent motel in the Catskills. That’s all cool. I like their updates. What isn’t cool is the acquaintance -- also from an old job -- who does nothing but post 200 times/day about her clients. “Princess Sassafrass* (*not a real name) just wrote this charming blog post, read it now and laugh your tutu off!” “Princess Sassafrass is appearing at a bus stop in Boston – all my Beantown peeps, ride the bus and show some luv.” “Princess Sassafrass is walking for a cure, donate today to rid the world of sadness and meanies!” You know what? This clueless bozo has now signed me up for Princess Sassafrass’s email newsletter! That’s where I draw the line. UNSUBSCRIBE!

THE HUMBLE BRAGGART
(This one might seem strange coming from me. After all, this is a personal blog.  I may as well be a 12-year-old with a diary, bacne, and a poster of Edward Cullen over my bed. But stick with me for a sec…)  “Ugh, I hate being inconvenienced by my brownstone reno #guessitstakeoutagain.” “Man, am I jetlagged from the trip to Tahiti #somebodygatorademe.” “Sucks when you don’t look as good as your bookcover #shouldawashedmyhair.” I’m sick to death of all this false modesty. No more: “Waaah, my diamond shoes are too tight.” Don’t be coy! I only want to see: “Eff-yeah! I’m so RICH I wear diamonds on my FEET. Boom.” Sure, I’ll still unfriend you, but I won’t want to give you a wedgie (though I *may* steal a shoe).


Maybe I’m cranky. Hey, did I mention, last week I had a meeting at Facebook’s Madison Ave offices? I was totally overdressed, sipping on free lemonade, contemplating the writing on the wall. It said, “Proceed and Be Bold.” So I stuck my resume in their binder.

Kidding... but annoying, right? Told ya!


Alright, rant over.  Tell me how YOU handle these folks...

poll by twiigs.com

tags: politics, polls, technology

Miss Jennifer Goes to Washington

Well, it’s over. And my mind? Blown.

I don’t think I can adequately describe the events of this past weekend in DC, leading up to the Kids' State Dinner at the White House.  It's all a wonderful, swirly blur in my head -- probably like when you get married and you need to see the video so the amazingness of the event really sinks in.

I’ll let these pictures tell the story…

The invite heard 'round the world.

We arrived at the Westin Georgetown on Friday, a few days ahead of time to get the lay of the land. 
Great hotel and staff -- the perfect place to host our families and make them feel special.

Then, the cookbooks arrived.  Look at all those cutiepies!

I swung by The White House to pick up a package for the kids...

A letter from the First Lady welcoming them to DC!

Meanwhile, back at the hotel, groceries were arriving for 54 families so we could give them some healthy snacks.
(Nevermind, Amex fraud alarms set off when they saw I bought $600 worth of goodies in a city I don't live in!)

Ever wonder what a mini-fridge full of milk looks like? (Hint: It's something like this)

Next, it was time to assemble the gift bags.  Sure, award shows might give out diamond sunglasses or trips to Tahiti. 
But do they have snazzy aprons and potholders?  I think not!

Meanwhile, Delta generously flew in families from 54 different states and territories.  For some kids, it was their
first plane trip.  (Hey, that Montana pilot looks a little young, no?)

Goodbye, Hawaii.  This little munchkin had her sights set on DC!

On Sunday, it was time to welcome our Junior Chefs!

This fine southern gentleman from Louisiana brought his grandpa, and some hotsauce and Mardigras beads for us! He writes a great blog
called the Jr. Food Critic, and I hear his fish tacos sure were tasty.

Michigan, meet South Carolina!



North Dakota's ready to whip up a batch of Turkey Vegetable Soup!

Outside the Smithsonian (in the rain) was our social media maven, Siobhan -- her lightning-quick fingers burned through at least 2 batteries posting all the fun to our networks so friends, families, and fans at home could follow along.

Here's Rhode Island with Julia Child, who would have been 100 years old on August 15th. Read more about this on her mom's blog, The Whole Bag of Chips.

While the group was treated to a private tour of the new Julia Child kitchen exhibit...



We got the Westin's Washington Ballroom ready for a pizza party (with veggies and whole wheat crust, of course).

Our People Magazine super chefs from Oklahoma, Texas, and North Carolina.

That's Vermont showing her USA pride!



Californians sure know how to party!

New Jersey, Nebraska, and DC, can I have your autograph?

Arizona, Maryland, and Hawaii wait patiently for the bus on Monday morning.  Did any of us sleep a wink?

Pennsylvania, New Hampshire, and Vermont are all smiles.

After a quick morning tour of DC, it was time for the Main Event.  Such a good lookin' bunch!

Striking a pose with a handsome young guy from Missouri.

Making our way up the walk.

At the security gate!

Wisconsin has wanted to be a "cooker" since age 3 -- can't wait to try her BBQ Cheddar Chickpea Burgers!

We make it inside and are greeted by famous White House photos... of pets!

And kids...

And dances.

Then came our official introductions and the media line.  So proud of these kids!

Here's Montana -- when she's not busy flying planes, she's making her delicious garden chicken pizza!
(Official White House Photo by: Sonya N. Hebert)

Families (including mine!) were able to watch our entrance on the live stream. Here I am, alongside an interview
of our Texas winner. You can watch the full entrance ceremony here.

We were escorted upstairs to the Grand Foyer where the Marine Corps band played, "When You Wish Upon a Star."

I'm thinking balloon giraffes aren't commonly seen at State Dinners.  Good thing he's sticking close to Connecticut. 

Willy Wonka himself couldn't have made more colorful, edible decorations.

Next we took photos with the First Lady in the Blue Room.  I don't have a pic of that -- yet -- but I can tell you she wore a stunning blue-green dress and cute blue shoes, she is taller than me (even in heels that made me close to 6ft tall!), and was an extremely warm and gracious hostess.



Next up was the East Room, the largest room in The White House.  That portrait of Martha Washington was painted in 1878.  It also contains their oldest artifact, a painting of George Washington that was rescued from the 1814 fire.

The rustic decor was amazing, from the farmtables to the vegetable centerpieces to the mason jar water glasses. 

We made it!!!

My seat -- and this is the Reagan china (a gorgeous red and gold dish after my own heart).

Behind the scenes, the chefs prepped our healthy meal, cooked in a kitchen no bigger than the stage!
(Official White House Photo by: Sonya N. Hebert)

CBS interviews Texas -- the Secret Service inspired his salad recipe and he hopes to be an agent one day.

Next up: Arizona.  This lovely lady has one heck of a handshake -- she's the most poised girl I've ever met!

Maybe one day, she'll be standing behind this podium!

Until then, Tanya will keep it warm.  This contest wouldn't exist without her vision and mission for healthy eating. 
And I have the pleasure of working with her every day!  (She's just as awesome as you think she'd be.)

In addition to co-authoring the book, Portion Size Me, and being a judge of the contest,
this impressive 12 year old got to introduce The First Lady.

The First Lady spoke of the importance of healthy eating, and took time to plan this whole lunch with her staff.  She was worried that the kids might get bored (!?!) so she invited the balloon guy and the band, Big Time Rush. Can you imagine getting that call?

Next, it was time to dig into a few winning recipes.

After munching on New York's crispy kale chips, we were served Arizona's tasty salad of quinoa,
black beans, and corn, with tomatoes, onions, and avocado.

I had an inkling there might be a special guest, since the cameras were supposed to leave after the opening remarks, but were still filming us eating lunch.  I thought it might be the girls.  I was wrong.  (That's my giant noggin on Nightline when they made the announcement.  Virginia, sitting behind me, looks just as surprised!)

Here's the President "crashing" the State Dinner.  He joked with the kids not to drop any food scraps on the floor
because their dog, Bo, was on a diet!

Then, he went around the room, and shook hands.  Every.  Single.  Hand.  Beyond impressive.
Here's a special moment for our winner from North Carolina.
(Photo: Saul Loeb, AFP/Getty Images)

This cable news station showed the President shaking my hand, but my back was to the camera, so it might be me... 
or it could be Cousin It in a blue sweater.  This one's definitely me.

Here's POTUS shaking my colleague Bari's hand.  She may never wash it again!
(Photo: Jim Watson / AFP - Getty Images)

Then, it was back to the food.  Kansas' cabbage sloppy joes and North Carolina's baked zucchini fries hit the spot.

I'm sure this butler has seen lots of strange things on the floor of The White House. 
A menagerie of balloon animals is probably a new one.
(Photo: Pablo Martinez Monsivais / AP)

It was a sweet ending with Hawaii's strawberryanna smoothie and South Dakota's summer fruit garland.

But the cherry on top was a mini-concert by Nickelodeon's Big Time Rush. 
(Pssst... download Windows Down, a catchy little tune, if ever I've heard one!)

A few fans from Alabama, New Mexico, Nevada, Louisiana, Arizona, and Ohio got a front-row seat.
(Official White House Photo by: Sonya N. Hebert)

Look at these Idaho beauties. (Teen Vogue, I think we spotted a new trend -- and your next covergirl!)
(Photographer: Stephanie Green/Bloomberg)

After we ate, White House assistant chef (and hottie) Sam Kass took us on a tour of the Kitchen Garden
and stopped for a pic with the lovely ladies from Puerto Rico.

On our way outside, we passed through this room.  I'm not sure what it's called, but isn't it just what you'd imagine a White House sitting room would look like?  I'm told there are 132 rooms, 35 bathrooms, and 6 levels in The White House. There are also 412 doors, 147 windows, 28 fireplaces, 8 staircases, 3 elevators.  (And a partridge in a pear tree.)

We strolled by the Rose Garden.  Or maybe it was the Jacqueline Kennedy Garden.  Either way, it was
loaded with pretty pink roses.

Even Bo made an appearance, and I'm pretty sure he came over in a limo.

Sam shows Louisiana, Mississippi, and Delaware the pumpkins growing in the garden.

And then shows the guys from North Dakota, Tennessee, New York, and Alaska a giant watermelon.

Even The White House honeybees were busy making honey for our visit.

Your typical woodland creatures: squirrels, birds, deer, rabbits.  And whales!
(Official White House Photo by: Chuck Kennedy)

All in all, a magical, humbling, unforgettable, incredible day.

So there you have it.  Honestly, the weekend couldn't have gone better if it was a Hollywood production.  Plus, nobody went missing (except 1 boy -- briefly -- but we found him!).  And the only tears were happy tears (except 1 girl -- briefly -- but we found her cookbook!).

The media was unlike anything I've ever seen.  Over 1,500 news outlets covered the event.  Washington Post.  New York Times. CBS.  CNN.  NBC.  Nightline.  Time for Kids.  Bloomberg.  USA Today.  Daily News.  The Late Show.  All of these little people being recognized for all the right reasons makes me smile.

The vast majority of the feedback on our event on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest was overwhelmingly positive too (though a few bad apples did try spoiling the bunch with their negativity). As an American, it’s a true honor to be invited to The White House, regardless of who sits behind the desk in the Oval Office. I feel sad for anyone who can’t separate politics and partisanship from a program that empowers kids and advocates healthy eating.

Professionally, it was a career highlight that is unlikely to be matched. Personally, I got tremendous joy from experiencing this through the eyes of these amazing kids. I am totally inspired and feel proud to have met them and their families!

If you'd like to download a copy of the winning recipes, visit our site.  From Apple Aliens to Secret Service Super Salad, you'll find nutritious, tasty, and creative meals for kids of all ages. 

Now, don't be shy -- list YOUR favorite healthy lunch below...


PS: Thanks a TON for helping me decide what to wear.  As you can see, I went with the outfit from The Gap, based on the popular vote.  It doesn't get much more American than that!



tags: food, politics, travel, work