Federal Un-Reserved

I don’t typically blog about guys I've never met. But I'm making an exception.

I’m fully aware how out-of-practice I am in the dating department, so I specifically chose eHarmony because of their guided communication process. It's less scary.  Not like Match where you generally meet up right away. I'm not ready for that. 

I need a barrier.

Now, barely a day goes by that I don’t receive a request to communicate from a guy. And I decline almost ALL of them. It’s not that I think I’m that great, because if recent history has taught us anything, um… I’m not.

It’s just that if I'm certain I’m not interested -- based purely on a 30 second assessment of his profile and pictures -- I don’t want to waste his time. Or mine.

Mainly mine.

Anyway, about 2 weeks ago, I heard from a guy. Let’s call him Alan Greenspan, former chairman of the US Federal Reserve banking system. “AG” was 44, 6’1”, and owned a home in Forest Hills, NY. Never married, no kids, worked as a “US government securities compliance examiner,” whatever that is, and classified himself as someone who was good at managing his finances. I should hope so!

If the pictures were to be believed, he had blonde hair (which I don’t typically go for), nice teeth (which I do), and was as cute as a 44-year-old grown man can be. Despite the fact that he loved the Rangers, Dave Matthews, and dogs, like someone I once knew, I decided to reply.

First, we exchanged multiple choice questions and answers. Mostly stupid stuff like, if you were to go on a dream vacation, would it be to a cottage by the sea, or to Paris, or a sandy beach, or hiking? (I'm allergic to hiking.) Then we traded our top 10 relationship must-haves and can’t-stands. (Can you guess what mine might be?) Finally, we sent short answer questions, like what is your best physical feature? (My rack -- kiddiiiing -- my smile.)

Finally, it was on to open communication. At this stage, we were still emailing through eHarmony so no contact information changed hands. But he seemed nice and normal, so I moved forward.

I won’t describe what happened next, you’ll just have to read it for yourself. Here is our email exchange, unedited:


Hi Jennifer,

Thanks for your responses so far during these initial stages. It's been great getting to know you...and I'd love to find out more. I know you said you had written up a response to my second question (i.e. What are the most important interests/activities/beliefs you want to share with your partner? Tell me your thoughts on kids/family, living near/around NYC, music/dancing, sports, PDA/intimacy, pets, vacation, politics, and religion) but that it would not fit.

Let me know your thoughts on those items, especially intimacy. I ask about that specifically since I see that among your ten must haves that you do not have either passionate, affectionate or sexually knowledgeable. What is your opinion and desires when it comes to sharing affection and passion with your partner. An unreserved physical expression of feelings is part of the necessary communication in a long term relationship. I want someone who also wants to be able to freely express their attraction (verbally and physically) to her partner. And I'd love to know about the other issues as well.

Hope to hear from you soon,
AG 



Hi Alan,

Thanks for your note. I’ve enjoyed getting to know you too! I have to be honest, though, I’m a little uncomfortable discussing intimacy in depth at this stage. I wouldn’t list anything overtly sexual as a top 10 requirement in the person I date mainly because as a woman, I think that message attracts the wrong type of guy. I purposely selected “Chemistry” instead. I agree, both physical and emotional intimacy are critical to a lasting monogamous relationship, but it takes time to build that trust.

If you don’t agree, that’s totally ok, but then perhaps we aren’t a match. If you can understand my point of view, then please write back and I’d be more than happy to answer the rest of your questions.

Best,
Jen



Hi Jen,

While I don't want to make you discuss anything that makes you uncomfortable, I was looking for general attitude toward intimacy (affection, verbal and physical exchanges) with your partner. If it is something that is not important to you, then at least I know that before I decide anything about a chance for us. If you are on board with me on this issue, then we should move forward and talk on the phone.

As much as chemistry may include intimacy, I wish to specifically address it since I want to be able to be unreserved with my partner when it comes to expressing my high regard for her. I understand trust is needed to enable both persons to express themselves and that you do not want to attract the wrong guy, but since honesty is needed from day one, I just want to make sure we see eye to eye on this topic.

I understand that you wouldn't be verbally or physically intimate with any person early on, but I'm not into holding back feelings (especially verbally)...it's my way of always being honest.

Care to share any more details?  Feel free to call me at 917-XXX-XXXX whenever you have time.
AG



Greenspan,

Thanks for writing back. I guess I feel like I have told you generally what my attitude towards intimacy is -- I think it’s important. I’m a fan. But now I have to be blunt -- I’m put-off by your fixation on this topic. Particularly when we don’t even know the most basic things about each other, like where we grew up or if we have any siblings. Passion, intimacy, chemistry, whatever, develops over time. Or it doesn’t.

Thanks for your number, but I really don’t care to share any more details on this topic. I wish you good luck with your search.

Goodbye,
Jen




Okaaaay. So was it wrong of me to be totally weirded out here? Was I too harsh?  Am I the jerk for not wanting to discuss this?

No. 

Personally, I think I should have turned this into a drinking game and taken a shot every time he said the word “unreserved.” I'd have been shitfaced after the first paragraph.  What does it even mean, anyway?

Vote below:

poll by twiigs.com

tags: dating, polls

“C” Is for Cookie (and for Cheapo)

Last week, I woke to find a white envelope slipped under my front door.

Was it a love note? A Chinese takeout menu?  No!

It was a card from my apt building. Wishing me happy holidays from all 17 people who work here on staff. That’s right -- SEVENTEEN total doormen, front desk guys, maintenance men, porters, and a partridge in a pear tree.

The first year I lived in this building, I received a similar note -- a tipping guide, if you will. And tip I did! I must’ve been rich that year because I gave everybody at least a little something.

Last year, though, was a cold winter. Downright frigid.  I’d just gotten engaged and had a whole new family to buy Christmas gifts for (on the same old salary), so I cut the building's staff off my list.

Scrooge! Grinch! Cold AND Heat Miser!

I know.  I felt kinda bad about it, really I did, but I’m not made of money! Besides, I wound up moving in March, so I wouldn’t even have been able to reap the year-long benefits of my yuletide generosity. I really had no choice, it was the only sensible thing to do.

Well… who’s the holiday jackass now? This guy!

I’m back, and though I’m still a broke-ass after my 3 moves and various other ridiculous associated expenses, I really couldn’t ignore how helpful the guys in my building have been. They brought a bunch of deliveries up to my apt for me before I even moved back in. They help me every time I come home with a rental carload of paper towels, cases of water, Nutella, and other necessities after my trips to Jersey or CT. They handle my drycleaning for me.  And they only asked me ONCE why they don’t see my “husband” around anymore.

I wanted to make them all gifts this year. Hmmm… but what to make? Scarves? Ornaments? Macaroni necklaces? Nah. I decided on cookies. Who doesn’t love cookies? But it’s insane to make over 200 cookies from scratch (my roommate and I did it once in college, but we drank a lot back then), so I had to cut some corners.

Here’s my 7-step recipe for when you’re long on time, but short on cash:

1. Visit your neighborhood grocery store and clean them out of slice'n'bakes. Mix in some variety -- I went for sugar, chocolate chip, chocolate chocolate chunk, and gingerbread. And get some pretty wrappings while you're at it.  Because handing someone a fist-full of cookies in a tissue says you just passed out on the F train due to low blood sugar -- NOT happy holidays.

2. Buy disposable cookie sheets. Even if you have a dishwasher, you'll be glad you did (if you feel guilty, recycle them when you're done, you crazy treehugger).  Grab a spoon, then scoop and roll little dough balls until your fingers hurt.  13 per tray -- but who's counting?

3. Bake as many as you can at a time, and keep an eye on those suckers. Flip the trays around, top to bottom, front to back, because nobody says "yum" when eating burnt treats, execpt your mom when you were 5 years old.  The bar is set considerably higher now, particularly when the recipients would prefer a gift you cannot eat.  Like cash.

4. You’ll never have enough cooling racks for this quantity of cookies, so line the few counters you have with paper towels for a quick cool down.  Extra points for neatness.

5. Organized cookies taste better, so count out all your supplies before you start. And save some for yourself.  One for Israel, one for me.  One for Vinko, one for me.  One for Sydney, one for me.  One for Kelvis, one for me... You get the idea.

6. Make an assembly line with all your pretty wrappings -- and start stuffing. Every package must look the same -- like little toy soldiers.  Showing favoritism in ANY way could result in an unwanted admirer or worse -- an angry doorman who “accidentally” lets the elevator close in your face.

7. Don’t forget to put your apt number on the treat bags -- they may not know your name, but they DO know where you live!









In total, I spent about 6 hours on a rainy Sunday and $88.47 to make 17 dozen cookies. That’s $5.20 per guy. Even with insane NYC grocery store prices -- I can live with those economics.

And I think they ate them. Well, I hope they ate them. But if they didn’t, I hope at least they don’t smush them into my mailbox or my front door while I’m away for the holidays. After all, it's the thought that counts, right?

poll by twiigs.com

Hey, do you know what else “C” is for?  Christmas.

Hope yours is merry!


tags: city life, food, holidays, polls

Are You There Blog? It's Me, Jenny

I recently gave this blog a fresh look so it could feel all pretty for today.

What's so special about today? This blog turns 2 years old!

I started it on Sept 14, 2008, while I was sitting on my couch, reflecting on a bizarre night out with my colleagues. I'd just moved to the city, I needed a hobby, and this seemed as good as any. I thought it would lead me back to doing something with my unpublished novel. But quickly, it took on a life of its own.

I really enjoy blogging. Random topics pop in my head all the time. If I think they might be interesting to you, too, I jot down my thoughts (no matter how ridiculous), and click "publish."  Instant gratification.

Recently, that all changed.

These past few months, writing has been a cathartic activity that helped me get through what was, hands down, the most difficult time of my life. Like therapy, only free. And if you think the posts you read felt personal, you should read the ones I DIDN'T publish. I can't read those myself without crying.

Turning this blog into what was essentially a very public diary helped when it was difficult to speak. From the bottom of my heart, my sincere thanks goes out to all of you who reached out to me. Your friendship is what kept me going.

I'm relieved to say, I've turned a corner. The worst is behind me and I'm back to posting about random things that hopefully make you laugh. Or at least smile.

Anyway, I like to take stock each year and see how the blog is doing. As you'll see, this one's been a rollercoaster.  Thanks for coming along for the ride...

Total Posts I've Written (including this one):
114

Average Number of Posts I Write Per Month:
4.7 (down from 6.3 last year)

Average Number of Unique Visitors Per Month:
62 (up from 35 last year)

Average Pageviews Per Month:
338 (up from 273 last year)

Average Time Spent Per Visit:
4 minutes 47 seconds (up from 3 minutes 23 seconds last year)

Most Read Blog Post (3-way tie):
Off the Market
Joy to the World
Let You Down

Post Nobody Gave a Crap About (4-way tie):
The Rachel
The Skunkies
Dear Santa...
More Cowbell

Most Comments:
Let You Down

Most Popular Poll:
M&M (&M&M&M&M&M)

Most Frequently-Used Tag For the Posts I Write:
Pop Culture

Most Popular Search by Visitors (2-way tie):
Breakup
Getting Married


As we head into year 3 of this "hobby," I'd love to hear what you want me to blog about.  So don't be shy, vote below!

poll by twiigs.com

 
tags: holidays, polls, writing

M&M (&M&M&M&M&M)

I knew this week was going to be tough, with my birthday on Aug 3rd and my fake wedding day on Aug 7th (even though we never set an official date, we were getting married on the 7th according to our wedding gift registries).

But I’m TIRED of feeling awful. You know what makes me feel better?

Chocolate. And potato chips. And aerosol cheese eaten directly from the can. Kidding about that last one. I put it on a cracker first.

Anyway, I’ve been wanting to try pretzel M&Ms. I mean, I like salty-sweet just as much as the next guy! But I felt I needed to try this new combo in the context of some tried and true flavors. So I gathered 7 packages of M&Ms, and 2 of my favorite people, to put the candies that melt in your mouth (not in your hands) to the test.

In the tradition of my hard-hitting culinary investigative journalism on the subject of Giant Cheetos, I submit to you…

The Great M&M Taste-Off of 2010.

To follow along with the row of M&Ms in the picture, begin with the stinker on the right and work your way left. Oh, and the big brown blob below the row of M&Ms is a Junior Mint (we needed a palette cleanser).

#7: Coconut (white)
Nobody expected to like this one. And… no one did. While it “came in fun colors,” unfortunately, “it’s just not good.” The flavor is pretty “mild,” and it doesn’t have the texture you’d expect from something coconutty, so it feels a “bit like paste” in your mouth. It’s the only bag that went directly into the trash, with a definitive “there’s not a chance I would eat that.”

#6: Almond (orange)
This one was a disappointment (much like the over-hyped mega-M&M that came in sophisticated colors like beige -- like the world is clamoring for more BEIGE candies). Its “nutless taste” was surprising, given the size of the nut inside. Maybe it “needed salt?” Any way you bite it, it was “boring” and “not worth the extra fat.”

#5: Plain (red)
This was the most surprising. The one that started it all was “sweeter than I remember” and the “crunch was more satisfying than the taste.” The milk chocolate “isn’t rich, which is why you can eat a whole bag,” but the sweetness was “gross after a while.”

#4: Dark Chocolate (brown)
With this one, it’s important to note that nobody in the room thought they liked dark chocolate. And I’m guessing in the authentic flavor department, these are to actual dark chocolate, what Taco Bell is to Mexican food. But nevertheless, “once the taste got going, it’s not bad.” And everybody agreed, “I’d eat it before coconut.”

#3: Pretzel (red)
The reason for the taste test did not disappoint… most of us. Cries of “oooh” and “I’ll have another!” were tempered by its dismissal as a “novelty.” The perfectly round shape makes them "fun to shoot across the table." All of us were curious, “what does it look like inside?” and I wondered, “why no yellow?”

#2: Peanut Butter (blue)
A crowd-pleaser, this “cousin to Reese’s Pieces” had a “strong peanut butter taste” and was “very creamy.” We felt that while you “don’t really taste the chocolate, it’s ok.”

#1: Peanut (green)
What can you say about this guy that hasn’t already been said? You can’t deny this “lumpy classic” is “satisfying.” Its “filling, peanutty taste” is what kept us going back for "more, please!"


And there you have it. The Peanut M&M reigns supreme. For now.

After all, you never know what the folks at Mars will come up with in an attempt to keep a 70-year-old brand relevant. Remember the limited-edition Strawberried Peanut Butter M&Ms they introduced with the Transformers movie last summer? I never understood the connection (did Optimus Prime have a sweet tooth?), and I couldn’t really figure out if I liked them. Even after eating the whole bag.

Somebody had to.

While we’re on the topic of eating a whole bag, PLEASE BRING THE CRISPY M&M BACK. They were delicious. Maybe I should start a Facebook group to rally people around a Crispy comeback. It worked for Betty White.

So, did we get it right? Weigh in below:

poll by twiigs.com

tags: food, polls, pop culture

Facelift

So Blogger tells me that this is my 100th post. 

Huh. 

Feels like there should be more, right?  I've been at this for almost 2 years.  So that's like once a week, tops.  I guess I blog just about as much as I floss.  (Which apparently isn't often enough because my dentist told me at my last cleaning that I have a cavity.  Somebody's asleep on the job and I don't think his name is Oral B.) 

Anyhoo... I'm really enjoying blogging again, but I've grown tired of this design, so I'm officially retiring the old look in favor of something new.  Seems to be a theme in my life lately.

So, what do you think?

poll by twiigs.com

Oh, and a disclaimer: I didn't like the templates Blogger had already built in, so I grabbed some code off the internet, and then hacked around on the parts I wanted to change.  For instance, this template used to be fire-engine red.  If it's wonky at all, I apologize. I also code HTML about as well as I floss.

Creepy Commercials

As you know, I just cleared out my DVR.

When I’m watching TV, like most people, I zip right through the commercials. (Even though I kinda love them.) But there are 2 that stop me in my tracks, mainly because they creep me OUT.

The first is for Tabasco and it involves singing pepperonis. Have you seen this? It is the stuff of nightmares! Now I can’t even LOOK at a pizza without expecting it to burst out in barbershop quartet-esque song. Let alone EAT one. Thanks, jerky Tabasco!




The second is for DirectTV and it involves an updated scene from Tommy Boy with David Spade and Chris Farley, who just so happens to be dead. And this isn’t the first time they used someone who died tragically in a commercial (hello little girl from Poltergeist). Super classy!




What do YOU think? Watch the commercials above, and then vote below:

poll by twiigs.com

Happy Blog-iversary

Well, I’ve been at it for exactly a year.

Blogging, that is.

It all started on a bizarre night at The Box, when I was hit with the distinct, swirly feeling that I wasn’t in Kansas, err... Pine Brook... anymore. And a blog was born.

As you know, this was my easy-breezy way to get back into writing, so I could eventually turn my attention back to my scary manuscript. But the reality is, I’ve had a ton of fun just blogging for blogging’s sake (although I don’t do it as often as I should -- bad Jenny!).

Even better, a couple of people out there actually read this thing! Probably even YOU. So hopefully, you’ve had some fun along the way too. (I especially love it when you leave me comments... hint, HINT.)

The one-year mark seems about the right time to peek under the hood and kick the tires. So, here’s a look at the blog's numbers, according to my good friend, The Google:

Total Posts I've Written (including this one):

78

Average Number of Posts I Write Per Month:

6.3 (Highest: December, Lowest: July)

Average Number of Unique Visitors Per Month:

35 (Highest: August, Lowest: February)

Average Pageviews Per Month:

273 (Highest: November, Lowest: February)

Average Time Spent Per Visit:

3 minutes 23 seconds

Most Read Blog Post (3-way tie):

Old Wooden Teeth

Seven Strikes

5 Reasons to Tune in to Top Chef

Post Nobody Gave a Crap About (5-way tie):

Bachelor Boo-Hoo

Ooh That Smell

No Scents

Thanksgiving in a Box

I Had a Crush on the Free Credit Report Guy

Most Comments:

Finger Lickin’ Good

Most Frequently-Used Tag For the Posts I Write:

Pop Culture

Most Popular Search by Visitors:

Dating

Not too shabby for a silly little hobby. But now, I sit at a crossroads. Do I freeze this blog as a snapshot in time, and end it now? Or do I push past my first year and ramble on?

The fate of this blog rests in your hands!

Vote below (and yes, that means EVEN you anonymous readers… I KNOW you’re out there):

poll by twiigs.com

To Move, or Not to Move?

Back around the holidays I told you about a love note I received from my building. Well, it wasn’t a love note exactly.

More of a list of people to tip.

Anyway, they’ve continued leaving treats in my mailbox these last few months. The next letter I received, roughly around Valentine’s Day, stated how much they enjoy having me as a resident (and frankly, who wouldn’t?), and how much they yearn to give me peace of mind about “rising rental costs.” Let me repeat… Rising. Rental. Costs. So they decided NOT to raise my rent, if I would simply agree to the small matter of renewing my lease 6 months before it expired.

Hmm, let me see if I understand this. Not raising my rent when the housing market has effectively collapsed, when about half my floor is empty, and when I know I’m paying way above market value for my teeny-tiny deluxe apartment in the sky?

How generous. You spoil me.

First offer -- REJECTED!

Some time went by (tick tock, tick tock), and my silence must have been deafening because about a week ago another letter came my way. Lo and behold, they are now offering flexible leasing terms to suit my needs. MY needs? Aw, how thoughtful! It turns out, renewing today for another 12 months will mean a $125/mo DECREASE. Nice to see they at least have a pinky toe in reality now -- the number is certainly moving in the right direction.

But we haven’t reached home.

My lease is up on August 1st, so I sit, and I wait (tick tock, tick tock), armed with three facts: 1) the same apt as mine, 4 floors higher, was going for $500/mo LESS than I’m paying, 2) the construction they’ve been doing on the balconies and the roof deck is moving at a snail’s pace (probably because they’re broke), making the building less attractive to new residents, and 3) the 2-bedroom to my left (home to a very sloppy family) and 1-bedroom to my right (home to French models, ooh la la) are both vacant and have been for many, MANY months.

Now, I really loathe the idea of moving -- it sucks the life out of me. Just the organization alone is enough to give me hives. So if I threaten to leave, it will be a bluff. I want to do no such thing. But I feel like I have an incredibly rare opportunity here.

I feel drunk with power!

So, beloved readers, I’d like your advice (don’t be shy, all the cool kids are doing it).

poll by twiigs.com

Stay tuned to the comments and I'll let you know how it all turns out...

Loyal Readers

I’ve been SUCH a slacker this month with my posts.

It’s not you, it’s me! I’ve wanted to blog. Really, I have. And trust me, I still do have a LOAD of meaningless things to say (especially since my Experiment is working).

I just haven’t found the time. No excuse, I know.

Earlier today, an anonymous Loyal Reader reminded me that I need to “get a typin’.” (I swear, it’s not my mom – she doesn’t understand how to work the computer). Anyway, he (or she) is totally right! But I need to get going on more than just my blog -- this friendly kick in the ass has also reminded me that what I REALLY need to get going on is my book.

My what? My book!

I originally started this blog as a way to get back into writing after a long hiatus. (If you already know this story, feel free to sing along.)

Follow me waaaay back in time to 2002. I was about to turn 29, and I was having a crisis of sorts. I wasn’t happy at my job, in my relationships, or with my living situation. To me, turning 30 was a very scary proposition, mainly because I had a long checklist filled with empty boxes (House, husband, kids? Nah, nope, nada!) Before I started a new decade, my life needed a spring cleaning. And I needed to shake things up a bit. So I took a vacation all by myself to the Cayman Islands for 10 days, and started writing a novel.

It was about a single girl. From Jersey. On the verge of turning 30. (They say write what you know, right?)

I wrote it in real-time from my 29th birthday until the time I turned 30. I’d work out the next plot point or piece of dialogue in my head while I was driving home from work. I’d jot down notes on napkins and gum wrappers during the day as something funny occurred to me. I slept with a notebook next to my bed. I knew exactly where the story began, and exactly how it would end, but the journey in between was shaping me as much as I was shaping it.

In the end, I wound up with a 280-page manuscript that was kinda funny and kinda touching, part fantasy and part based on my actual life (and the people in it).

Anyway, I spent the next year editing the story -- punching up the funny, filling in the blanks, and soliciting feedback from my close friends and family on ways to make it better, tighter, smarter. Now keep in mind, this was never meant to be the next Great American Novel -- it was nothing more than a summer beach read, a guilty pleasure. Written to be read in a weekend.

Because I started my career in book publishing, there was this false notion that I had all these industry contacts. Newsflash: The turnover in publishing is worse than at your local deli, so any experience I got there was pretty much useless (unless I wanted to order a turkey sandwich, in which case, the new guy behind the counter could bang one out just as good as the old guy).

I told everyone it didn’t matter if it ever got published. “It was fun just writing it,” I’d say. Sounds a lot like, “it was an honor just being nominated,” doesn’t it? Well, I was full of total crap. While I WAS afraid of having my writing and my story (which was loosely based on ME) judged by perfect strangers, I really wanted to get it published. Really bad.

Then, life got in the way.

Soon after I was finished editing, and re-editing, and re-re-editing my manuscript, my mom got sick. Most of my free time and energy went into helping my parents out. As it should. And thankfully, she's better now! But this lasted for several years, which left my poor book alone to fend for itself (it turns out, unpublished novels are very shy, lazy creatures who stubbornly refuse to see the light of day unless somebody actually sends them someplace -- who knew?).

So there mine sat, collecting dust. Which is exactly what it’s still doing right about… now.

To tell you the truth, I’m overwhelmed just thinking about reading it again -- it was such a snapshot of my life at the time. And that was my big “hook” -- the author has written it in real-time as she, herself, was turning 30! “What a wunderkind,” they would say.

Now, all these years later, I am more like stale Wonder Bread -- my pop culture references are hopelessly out of date and I’m actually closer to 40 than I am to 30 (and yes, the mere thought of that still makes me throw up a little in my mouth). And that long checklist I had filled with empty boxes? Still mostly unchecked.

So, Loyal Readers, I’d like your help…

poll by twiigs.com

Don’t see an answer you like in this multiple choice? Write your own below!

Code Yellow

It’s Peep Season!

I mean, what would Halloween be without candy corn? Christmas without candy canes? Valentine's Day without conversation hearts? Easter just doesn’t taste like Easter without at least 1 rack of these irrisistable sugar-crusted chicks. In fact, they’ll pop up in about 69% of all Easter baskets (making the other 31% of baskets officially sucky).

Personally, I like ‘em stale. Chewy, even. And I like to eat their blobby little heads first.

But who among us hasn’t put one of these fine fellows in the microwave just to see what would happen? For the love of science? No!

For the love of marshmallow.

Peep-a-mania is running wild. The Washington Post conducts an annual diorama contest. The Seattle Times, National Geographic, and even the American Bar Association host their own Peep-offs. There’s a Peep-eating contest (the record holder at 103 in 30 minutes is called Dennis Gross -- coincidence?). Peeps have gone medieval with Peep jousting (watch the clip to the end for the Peeps Civil War).

Yes, there’s even Peep porn (my eyes, MY EYES!).

If I’m feeling naughty, I’ll eat the King of All Easter Candy -- the Reese's Peanut Butter Egg, which is, quite possibly, the finest treat in all the land. But, if I’m feeling dainty and sweet, I go Peep.

The only question is what color?

poll by twiigs.com

Super Bowl Snack Poll

I can’t believe I’m blogging about football again.

It’s a sign of the apocalypse.

Anyway, my brother and sister-in-law invited me up to CT this weekend for Super Bowl Sunday festivities. Frankly, I couldn't care less if the Steelers or the Cardinals win -- I’m really just in it for the snacks.

I heard a rumor that my brother's making chili. But I'm not one to arrive empty-handed, so I’d like your advice on what to bring. What would YOU want to eat if I was coming to your house so we could ignore the game, watch the occasional commercial, and stuff our faces?

Vote below!

poll by twiigs.com